three years
August 9, 2012
***comments are closed, bitches! the winner has been picked and notified. thanks for playing!***
so i got this little notification yesterday,
that today is my blogiversary.
my third, to be exact.
i recall starting my blog roughly around the time i first moved to pittburgh in 2009. i’d left a vibrant group of friends, a burgeoning knitting group, and the best paying job i’ve ever had to pursue my academic career and live with my best friend. i don’t remember why i began blogging, per se, by which i mean, i don’t rememeber the specifics. i do know that all i wanted was to stay connected to the knitterverse, and try to be part of the conversation, as it were.
whatever the reasons, i never imagined what this blog would become. i never thought people would actually read and comment (i love every comment, especially from the regulars) i never thought total strangers would stop me to tell me they read the blog (the first couple times terrified me!) even though it was my goal, i didn’t think my blog would ‘succeed’ and, frankly, i’m surprised i’ve stuck with it this long.
of course,
the only reason i have
is because of you, bitches.
if people weren’t reading,
i’d’ve quit ages ago.
and since it seems like the industry standard
(and because it’s been ages since i’ve had one)
i’m doing a giveaway in honor of my third blogiversary.
the bitches get stitches third blogiversary giveaway!
the rules:
1. spread the word – you can do that anyway you see fit; reblog, tweet, e-mail, ravelry, phone call, whatever. just let another knitter know about the giveaway. it’s completely on the honor system. i trust ya.
2. leave a comment – it’s the easiest way to assign someone a random number for the all-knowing random number generator to pick a winner. make sure to comment on this post. you’d think i wouldn’t need to specify that but >shakes head from experience< and for the sake of fairness and my personal sanity, please leave only one comment.
3. this one’s most important – you only have the 24 hours from the time i posted to ‘spread the word’ and ‘leave a comment’. the winner will be announced tomorrow, august 10th.
the prize:
i’ve given this a lot of thought. well, as much thought as i could in less than a day. because it needed to extra special, and because it’s my favorite yarn company, i decided to give away a $100.00 e-gift certificate to blue moon fiber arts.
sound good?
thanks for sticking with me, bitches!
frustration 2012
August 7, 2012
i am frustrated. (get your head out of the gutter and focus, please)
i have literally been swatching for days for my rhinebeck sweater,
and frankly i’m thinking of throwing in the towel.
i want to make dale of norway’s liberec,
but i cannot for the life of me obtain the proper gauge.
(things might get technical and mathy after this)
the pattern was designed for either falk or heilo,
both of which are listed as sport-weight yarns.
i’ve decided to use blue moon fiber arts bfl sport
(which is amazing and if i ever figure this out,
you’ll get to see my amazing colors).
the gauge i’m supposed to obtain is 24sts/4″ on 3mm needles.
(my needle gauge says that’s a u.s. 3 but the internet says a u.s 3 is 3.25mm. anyway) on that needle, i was getting 30-32sts/4″.
i began to worry.
after swatching 5 times (5 times!!),
i’m up to a size 5 needle (3.75mm)
and i’m still not on gauge.
not to mention the fabric is loose for my taste.
how on earth are these norwegians getting that gauge on that needle?
then it hit me.
it’s not a sport-weight yarn. it’s dk.
ravelry says it’s sport.
the dale of norway website says it’s sport.
but it’s not. it can’t be.
i returned to ravelry. yep. heilo and falk are listed as sport.
then i saw the little ‘comments’ tab and my heart sank a little.
i clicked on it and what did i discover?
ravelers say it’s really more like a dk than a sport,
and even thicker than some yarns that are listed as a dk!
the only thing i can think of is dale of norway is calling their yarn sport-weight because they are knitting a dk yarn to a sport gauge on a smaller than standard needle (which will of course make a lovely thick fabric for skiing and improve stitch definition) rather than look at the actual diameter or wpi of their yarns.
in my despair, i considered just finishing the vest i was knitting/spinning for rhineback last year (and have secretly been working on this summer) since i was unable to complete it on time and has been hibernating ever since. then i remembered i’ve been emailing the designer because the pattern is wrong. i found one big error, and they sent me a corrected pattern. then i went to continue and found another. what really baffles me is how several people have ‘successfully’ knit the vest. how? the pattern it wrong! and it’s not something one can just figure out. i need the information from the designer!
(at what point should they offer me a refund?)
anyway.
i have a decision to make.
since ravelry tells me the only colorwork sweaters i can knit with sport-weight yarn are by dale of norway, i must either do some math to make this sweater happen at the gauge i’m getting (we won’t even go into the horror of row gauge and color work). or i can just give up.
i have a significant amount of extra yarn for the main color.
maybe i’ll just forget colorwork all together.
regardless,
i need to decide soon if i have any hope of finishing by rhinebeck.
suggestions??
i could use the advice.
mourning chavela, la voz áspera de la ternura
August 5, 2012
i was going to write one of my typical posts,
but i just found out that one of my heroines, chavela vargas, died today.
somehow my swatch just doesn’t seem that important anymore.
i’m having a lot of trouble articulating why i feel what i feel. it seems rather absurd, really, that upon reading of her death, i burst into tears. it makes no sense that one of mexico’s most beloved (and controversial) singers would be a hero to a white dude from michigan who doesn’t even speak spanish. but there’s just something about her life and music that . . . *sigh* i don’t know. she was a person who lived a hard, beautiful life and i admired her for it. for whatever reason, she meant something to me.
if you listen to paloma negra, and you don’t feel anything, i could never hope explain it to you. that’s the only way i can think to put it.
chavela vargas was one of the 20th century’s bravest, most important lesbians, and i worry history will forget that.
at least i won’t.
knitting archaeology
August 3, 2012
we all have skeletons in our closets.
as dude who grew up with pack rats,
mine is perpetually at capacity.
my recent retirement at my parents house*
allowed me to wade through and eliminate some of the actual crap
that my room has accumulated over the past twenty-seven years.
in the depths of my closet i discovered, among other things**,
a horrifying treasure from my knitting past.
that’s right.
i found my first knitting/yarn.
i thought it long lost, cast off and out of my life.
i should’ve*** known this yarn would haunt me for all of my days.
if you dig around my blog somewhere at the beginning,
you can find the story of how i first learned to knit.
i won’t reiterate that (awesome) story, now.
iet’s just say it was two in the morning,
i had a limited selection from which to choose,
and i like green.
because i love you, blog, so very much, and maybe because no amount of sin can ever wash the catholic completely from my blood, i feel compelled to confess my most grievous of knitterly sins to you. i just hope you can find it in your hearts to forgive me for buying this yarn.
t’was ignorance, the folly of youth.
however, i refuse to post a photo of that yarn on this blog.
that shame would be too great to endure.
rather,
i’ll link you to it;
follow at your own risk!
post continues after the jump. nsfw!
>exhales<
i think i'll be ok now.
i needed to get that off my chest.
seriously, though, i was totally happy to unearth this yarn.
how many people have the first thing they've ever knit?
(don't burst my bubble and tell me it's a totally common occurrence)
and while the idea of finishing the project is beyond appalling,
i'm happy to keep this fun fur on their size 10½ boyes
rather than quietly disposing of the evidence.
just know that my time on the dark side was short lived,
and i quickly purchased some much better yarn.
(angry cat mug from danmade. totally ripping off cauchy’s style)
that’s right.
i found my second piece of knitting/yarn, too!
the seed of a stash that never grew.
there’s no ball band for this yarn,
but the receipt says its an alpaca/silk/cashmere blend.
(talk about going from yarn zero to sixty, right?)
though, the astute observer can still tell this is the work of newbie.
notice the yarn is still in a hank and i’m knitting directly from the skein!
i can’t tell you the number of times i’ve warned new knitters never to do this unless they want tangles and heartbreak,
and yet, somehow, it worked out for me.
i guess when you don’t know any better,
you just go for it.
go figure.
sadly,
shortly after knitting that patch of garter,
i stopped knitting.
there were a lot of reasons, really;
the yarn was wicked pricey, and i thought if this is what real yarn cost, i was in trouble (i didnt realize of course, there was a range of yarns from which to choose) more than that, i didn’t have a positive experience with the store from which i bought it.
but if i’m honest, all of that didn’t matter.
it was the purl stitch.
this was back before you could google anything and learn how to do it from watching a video online. (i think it’s important to remember such times) i don’t know how i was learning to purl, but it wasn’t working. years later i would realize the crucial information that was missing was to move the yarn forward.
constantly doubling one’s stitch count
whilst knitting green fun fur
would make anyone quit.
i’m just glad it was only a temporary condition.
à demain, mes amis!
*i always write ‘home’ and mean ‘my parents house’, but it confuses people. i makes me sad to have to make a distinction.
**like my louis vuitton shoes, bitches!! i miss the old economy. *sigh*
***for all you fellow grammar nazis, i’ve noticed a trend among my students. they write could’ve/should’ve etc. thusly: could of. i remember one student being shocked when i corrected them. makes me want to die.
clockwork lives!
August 2, 2012
before i begin, let me tell you a little bit about how blogging works for me. time passes in long spells with nothing for me to write about. then, all of a sudden, five posts’ worth of stuff falls from the sky and lands in my lap. often, if i don’t write about it immediately, it becomes irrelevant and prime blog content is lost. this time, however, i’m going to try to ride this wave of blogworthiness and see if i survive.
here’s hoping for a string of good posts, eh?
first up, who remembers my clockwork?
it stalled out for a bit
but it’s on the move again.
recently, it went to fucking hawaii!
eutrapalia blogged about it here.
it is a tale of joy and woe.
do me a favor and go leave her a comment.
it’s knitters like her that make this silly dream possible!
kateyj took the clockwork to d.c.
here it is at the evolution exhibit of the smithsonian
and here it is on katey’s shuttle driver, marlon
katey is very organized
and has taken charge of getting the clockwork where it needs to go.
if you’re interested in hosting the clockwork,
maybe you can ravelry stalk her.
as for me,
i’m going to try to plan tomorrow’s post.
can you all handle two in a row?
white recluse
July 25, 2012
if any of you out there are only children,
you may agree with me that we are prone to solitude.
it isn’t that we don’t like people, or being with people.
we aren’t antisocial per se, it’s just. . .
we had a lot of alone time during our formative years
and we need to occasionally revisit that feeling of aloneness.
or maybe i’m just projecting my weirdness onto you people. sorry.
regardless! that’s what my prolonged silence has been about;
a bit of isolation in these last quiet months before ‘year two’ begins.
for a good chunk of the time,
i’ve been here, in the bed of my adolescence,
in the house that’s been my home since i was fresh out the womb.
my grandfather was living with my parents for a brief period,
but he’s happily moved out into the old folks home.
luckily, from what i can tell,
‘happily’ is exactly the right word
his unassuming charm (and lack of dementia)
have made him quite the popular chap, apparently.
and so it’s just the three of us,
mom, dad, and i, just as in old times,
bickering, laughing, observing wildlife,
playing pinochle and canasta like fiends.
i never sleep better than when i’m here.
in this room, i’m surrounded by childhood mementos that recall times i know i lived but can barely imagine. i look at photos and certificates and medals and boxes of comics and books and stuffed animals and it’s like i’ve lived three lives already. no wonder i feel old.
i realize just how lucky i am, at 27, to still have a place to come home to, where i’m fed and loved and can wear yesterdays clothes without judgement. the only thing that’s changed is my mom knocks and then
waits for a response before barging into my room.
mostly.
but you don’t really care about my sappy thoughts.
you want at least some fiber content.
unfortunately, i haven’t been all that fibery.
i did, however, do my own personal tour de fleece.
compared with people like helloyarn, david of southern cross fibres, the harlot or frankly anyone else who participated, i am the rankest of amateurs. the fact of the matter is, i’m a slow spinner with very little instruction. the fact that i can make yarn at all is a victory.
i had one simple goal: finish spinning my rhinebeck fiber.
i started it back in april and made a lovely skein.
during my tdf, i made two more.
(mo is serving you french bulldog realness!)
that’s 8oz of corriedale top from …into the whirled in the ‘rendition’ colorway. the skein in the back is the original. the subsequent two are much more fingering-sport weight whereas the original is a sport-dk.
i’m still happy.
you may have also noticed a little mini skein hanging out there with it’s big brothers. that is my real tdf victory. by some miracle, i spun the exact same length of single on each bobbin for the second skein; no leftovers. (i did plying dance of joy that featured some very inappropriate movements) for the final skein, i split my remaining fiber in half, spun my singles, and had quite a bit left over on one bobbin after plying (wtf?). since i only had 8oz to begin with and i wanted to maximize yardage, i decided to navajo ply the remaining single and i’d use it for the cast on or something. after all, this is tdf! i should end with a challenge. (did i mention i’ve never navajo plied?)
now, in knitting, i can pretty much pull of any technique of which i know the theory. in spinning, this is not the case (see above comment about rank amateurity). i’m telling you, bitches, if you had seen the scene of me navajo plying…..not my most graceful moment.
somehow though, i pulled it off. there’s way too much twist in it and my ‘loop lengths’ are in no way regular, but a good soak and one serious thwacking later and i’ve got some decent yarn.
go me.
but just when i feel pretty darn smug about clearing out 70% of my spinning stash, this arrives
this box contains one special alpaca fleece (thanks sally!)
i have no idea how i’m going to clean, card, or spin this,
but how hard can it be?
sipping a moscow mule
July 20, 2012
just in case any of you were worried
i am, in fact, still alive.
a real post is forthcoming.
until then,
edith and i are going to spend some quality time together.
tina killed my chicken
July 12, 2012
it has come to my attention,
that the chicken tina named in my honor,
ambrosia,
has gone missing in the woods.
i believe she decided that living with her comrades was boring,
and ran off with a lady-coyote with whom it had fallen madly in love.
the only question is, where will they make their home?
(tina thinks the coyote killed her, but that just seems silly to me. right?)
but let this be a lesson to all of you;
never let your daughters out the coop!
ambrosia, wherever you are now,
i dedicate this song, to you:
you’ll be missed, ambrosia.
luckily,
steven jr. is alive and well.
nice and cool after his first shearing.
i might even get the fleece!
alpaca allergy be damned.
the story of the o w l sweater
July 8, 2012
read the post and
send debanhams an email
i think hand knitting should count for something.
help kate show them it does.
Back in November 2008 I was swatching with some nice grey Rowan yarn. I thought at first that it wanted to become bobbles – I had an idea that I would make a sweater inspired by the texture of the arses of some wonderful rhinos I had recently encountered (no joke – see this post). But I also had another thought – to make a sweater featuring the owl cable – a stitch pattern that has been around since (at least) the 1940s, featuring mostly on children’s garments. As soon as I swatched up my first owl, I knew that I was not going to make a rhino-arse sweater, I was going to make an o w l sweater.
When I posted pictures of my finished sweater on my blog – making full acknowledgment of all the other owl-related designs that I had seen which had inspired me –…
View original post 1,417 more words
coffee
July 3, 2012
dear v.,
i’m staying with new friends in detroit.
up über early, by which i mean
i never went to bed.
i’m at the so-called ‘snooty’ coffee shop, torino.
it.
is.
amazing.
best mocha ever, by far.
(you know i know my mochas!)
whipped cream with visible flecks of vanilla bean
a copy of proust sitting next to me which
i pretend i’m going to crack
and have no intention of reading.
have i mentioned it’s also a bar?
mocha with a shot?
yes, please!
(if only i were so bold at 7:34)
sitting here, looking out at the fucking insane storm clouds, last night’s too-tight black tee the epitome of ‘damp’ (v-neck, bien sûr),
getting up for another
wishing your cutoffs were here,
keeping mine company.
love forever,
steven
Bitches Get Stitches 