microblog 13

March 30, 2012

what i’d like to be doing

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what i’m actually doing

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microblog 12

March 28, 2012

you may recall that there’s an alpaca in colorado named after me.
well now there’s a baby chick in oregon named in my honor.
meet ambrosia:
the fiber world is a weird place,
but i like it.

pilgrimage

March 25, 2012

depending on which side of the family tree you look at,
i’m either fifth or sixth generation michigander.
i’m also the first generation
not to grow up in detroit.

my family emigrated from ireland and settled in detroit
and did all those big life things in the motor city:
work
school
marriage
death
burial (i discovered our family plot)
all with a particular irish catholic flare.
my grandmother’s grandfather was chief of police.
my grandfather’s grandfather built a house there for a staggering sum.
(though that might be the german side. not as popular in the family lore)
last time we checked, someone’s still living in it.

the same feeling that made me weep when i found my ancestral knock in co. kerry i often feel when i go to detroit.
getting to know detroit
makes me feel closer to my family history.
it may be silly or illogical or whatever,
but it’s something i enjoy doing.

this saturday,
i was lucky enough to make it to john k. king used and rare books.
(sorry for the photo quality. clouds + iphone + no photoshop = reality)

the connection to my knitting blog?it used to be a glove factory!
though, i think they may have been sewn,
not knitted.

still,
walking around a factory
that purports to have 1,000,000 books. . .
overwhelming just isn’t a big enough word.
being there ignited the hoarder within
and i left with more books that i need.

while i doubt any of my family members went there
it’s still a really cool piece of detroit history.
and now, it’s part of mine.

microblog 11 (i think)

March 23, 2012

knitting tip of the day:
bunch up your stitches at the end of your needle.
the yarnharlot calls this “spring loading”
because the stitches are sitting there ready to jump off the needle.
(see ms. pearl-mcphee, i was paying attention)
this can cut seconds off of those long rows
and saving seconds can really add up,
especially if you’ve got hundreds of stitches on your needles like i do.

be warned! – spring loading can change your gauge.
so don’t do it in the middle of your project!!

this lame-ass post was just an excuse
to share the fact that i’m actually knitting.
it’s a rare treat.
join my joy.

wordpress ate this post

March 18, 2012

believe you me,
the post i wrote was fucking hilarious.
you might even have called it bitches get stitches gold.

but it’s gone.

should i try to recreate it?
will it come off as artificial?
what if i hadn’t even told you?
would you have noticed something was missing?
that ‘thing’, that quality of spontaneity in all my best posts?

it’s moot.
i’m not rewriting it.

instead,
here’s the spark notes version:

getting yarn as a gift no longer makes me happy.
rather, i see it as an unwittingly hostile act.
i live in a tiny apartment.
my stash is full.
i have no time to whittle it down
to add something new, no matter how beautiful.

so while when tina sent me yarn for my birthday/christmas
i was initially overjoyed by it’s timeliness
and my unexpected adoration for the grawk color way,
i soon realized there was no room in my blue moon bin for more yarn.

those two skeins just sat on my work table
mocking me every time i passed them by.
the twisted skein was particularly shameless.
i swear,
just once,
it flashed its junk.
the mopsy was more reserved.
it only showed a little side boob now and then.

well i refuse to be mocked by wool!
so i put that twisted skein on my swift
and started winding that bitch.

now,
that skein has some generous yardage.
so i realized my winder wouldn’t be able to take it.

all.

i knew i’d have to finish winding it by hand.
(this ain’t my first time at the rodeo!)
what i didn’t foresee, was that
this skein would break my shitty knit picks winder.
yes folks, my winder is now
in pieces!

undeterred, i slid the skein to my nostepinne
(can some give me a definitive spelling on that word?)
and wound the shit out of that skein.

i shed no tears for the crappy piece of plastic.
i wouldn’t give the skein the satisfaction.

but what to knit with it?
i already have the shawl
for those five minutes a week i can knit something complicated.
i needed something easy,
something i can knit in dark
when i’m at the film collective
or between sections.

but the thought of, say, a ribbed scarf
made me want to commit suicide.
the skein would want that.
and i won’t let it win.

then it came to me
a garter scarf knit lengthwise.
nothing could be easier, right?
and i’ve never knit one.

perfect.

the colors are distributing in a way i adore.
if i’ve done my math correctly, it’ll be a little more than 6′ long.
and with the extra yardage, i’m hoping it will be more stole than scarf.

sorry bitches.

veronica already called dibs.

here is where i had a perfect, witty segue to tell you about some new socks in my life. it was inspired and tied together two seemingly unrelated topics. but fuck it. it doesn’t work now.
here they are:

no, i did not knit these.
they were knit by the official sock knitter of bitches get stitches:
weirdy pants jen
i love jen for many reasons.
many a giggle fit was had over a funny look
or our shared views on parenting, and how you’re doing it wrong.
(really, we owe our friendship to our mutual friend, bessie, god rest her)
but it takes a special kind of knitter to knit socks
just because you ask them to.

they are slightly too big
by which i mean,
they fit perfectly.
by which i mean,
they have no ease,
positive or negative.
socks should have a tad of negative ease.
and while i’ve heard rumors of success with shrinkage,
that’s just not a concept i’m comfortable pursuing.
instead, they will be my new bed socks.
my favorite pair snagged on a trip to the lou
leaving a big hole in the foot.
these are a perfect replacement.
thanks jen!

there you have it, folks.
a shadow of it’s former glory,
perhaps,
but a post nonetheless.

ps dear tina,
ignore everything i posted above. it’s all lies. send me all your yarn whenever you please. a space just opened up on my work table!

that we’re not dead.
we’ve just been on spring break.
we’ll be getting out of bed shortly
to show you some yarn.
promise.

here’s an expert tip for conference goers:
putting the butter packet in the condom pocket of your jeans
is a great way to make it spreadable.

so long as you don’t forget it’s there.
then you’ll have a melted butter mess
and permanent stain on your jeans.

i’ll let you imagine which scenario happened to me this morning.

(and yes, i’m wearing jeans at a conference. i figure if a dude on my panel can wear jeans and a ribbed sweater from the early 2000’s while giving his paper, i can wear jeans when i’m not giving a paper)