packed my bags last night, pre-flight
July 27, 2011
tomorrow evening, i’m on a plane to portland.
i am going to the summit.
tonight i’m knitting my little wrist off.
like many a student before me
i didn’t do my homework.
i’m cheating a little,
making it work,
using sport weight yarn on 2.75mm needles
rather than fingering weight on 2.25mm needles.
it’s just like that old trick of adjusting your margins
in order to meet the minimum page number.
(like you never changed your margins and watched the sun come up)
i promise, mr. habit,
it’ll be ready in time for class.
i usually take better pictures than this.
it’s just . . .
my iphone was handy
and i need to finish this homework
and my summit sock probably won’t fit
and i have a shawl to finish by august 1st
and i’ve been packing for days
and i leave pittsburgh in a week
WHOAREYOUTOJUDGEME!?!
*pant* *pant* *pant*
alright.
i’m ok now.
in any case,
this is my class schedule:
7/28
9:00am photographing your fiber – franklin habit
7:00pm opening night reception
7/29
9:00am knitted tessellation: playful and powerful patterns in practice – franklin habit
3:00pm hizsocks: making socks manly – stephen houghton
10:30pm sock hop
7/30
9:00am tvaandsstickning/twined knitting – nancy bush
5:15pm this. but only to document, not participate. as if!
7:00pm this is your brain on knitting – stephanie pearl-mcphee
7/31
9:00 am fleece on your feet – judith mackenzie
so if you see me in class,
or wandering around the convention center,
you bitches better say hello!
(do you think the harlot ever cheated on her sock homework?
Bitches Get Stitches 
July 27, 2011 at 1:39 am
Dear Steven,
Damn it! I am not in one of the classes you are taking. But I do have a seat in Stephanie’s Brain on Knitting thing. This will be my first knitting conference and the first time I have seen Yarn Harlot in person.
I just realized you are attending Sock Summit and then just days after moving from city to city. Holy cow. I’m feeling smug because I just moved the contents of one purse into a new one.
I hope I get to say hi and introduce myself, that is, if there isn’t too big of a crowd hanging on you. Hehheh.
Fondly,
Nancy Paris
July 27, 2011 at 3:29 am
We shall meet at last.
See you in Portland.
July 27, 2011 at 7:35 am
Jealous jealous. Have fun!!!
July 27, 2011 at 7:55 am
Next year, Rivendale Farms and I will be there! I promise, she promises, we BOTH promise! Have fun, take lots of photos and be sure to write SCORES of paragraphs about it!
July 27, 2011 at 8:02 am
Jan, you’re on – and with any luck you’ll be out of the sling by then!!
Stephen, very happy for you, but green-with-jealousy bitch for me. The classes, teachers and people will be amazing, but I’m almost more pissed I’ll miss the flash mob. Can’t wait to hear about it and see the photos.
To Nancy above: your line about changing purses freakin’ killed me! Thanks for the morning laugh.
July 27, 2011 at 8:16 am
I am very jealous of all the classes you’re taking! Enjoy!
July 27, 2011 at 10:56 am
I’ll be there Friday thru Sunday. I’ll keep an eye out for you!
July 27, 2011 at 12:28 pm
I read the title and was sure I’d see the phrase “sock-et man” in her., But you’d never stoop to punning, would you?
July 27, 2011 at 5:54 pm
I love you and am very sorry that I won’t be in Portland, but a grandma who just got her first chemo treatment on Monday calls. I hope you have an amazing time. I’ll be in Michigan for a full week just a couple days after your birthday, so maybe we’ll have our own birthday dinner and drinks. We can go see male strippers, I can get crazy on Red Bull and you can throw up in my car. It’ll be like old times, except I’ll be technically sober. AND WE SHOULD GO TO BINGO NIGHT (I’ll buy you a laundry hamper afterwards)!
July 27, 2011 at 11:40 pm
What?! I can’t believe you leave Pittsburgh in a week and I arrive in Pittsburgh in a week. The universe is playing a trick on me … I was looking forward to at least one well-wooled fellow snarky knitting bitch in the city. *sigh*