January 6, 2012
and the next day i had the mothah fuckin’ plague.
we’re talking bloody swollen tonsils,
fevers, shaking, mild hallucinations/dreams.
it was like i was in some kind of sweat lodge or something.
(go ahead bible thumpers. use it as evidence)
i called my mom to inform her that i planned on staggering to the hospital. i live a couple blocks away from one. i think ahead.
apparently, that was nonsense.
apparently, going to the emergency room for violent shaking due to a high fever and a pain in my throat so severe i thought death had taken up residence in my mouth would not have been covered by insurance.
apparently, if you can live with that kind of misery (which apparently one can), it does not constitute an emergency.
instead, she dispatched my father
who then brought me to her office
where i was promptly jabbed in the ass with a needle.
i then spent about six hours in my childhood bed
where my fever convinced me i had figured out the science/math of pain. (i shit you not. i thought i had solved the formula for how pain worked and was measured. a fever is a powerful thing)
i’m better, now.
i love western medicine.
which allows me to tell you of my recent plan to finish up some projects
it clearly goes without saying
that being a phd student cuts into one’s knitting time.
which means i haven’t had a fo to show in a while.
but as the new semester approaches,
i really felt the need to finish something.
and i did.
i decided to cast on this shawl as way to work through it.
as things got better, (and they really did)
and i found my happiness here,
i stopped working on it.
i didn’t need this shawl anymore.
pattern: terra yarn: mad tosh pashmina in ‘mare’
i modified the pattern to work with a sport weight yarn. i didn’t write down the math but if you wanted i’m sure you could figure it out.
it’s being sent off to nancy, a loyal reader and sock summit stalker.
(literally, she knew what class i was taking and waited outside the door to meet me. that is dedication i can get behind).
she is taking this lovely shawl in lieu of the socks i owe her.
i think it’s a smart trade; god only knows when those socks will get done. and, really, does a lady in san diego need a pair of wool man socks?
i don’t think so.
it’ll be in the mail later today nance!
i should have another fo soon.
anyone want to guess what oldie i’m working on?
December 27, 2011
that’s what’s playing on my tv right now.
(gotta love netflix for providing those ’80s classics)
so the other day, i knit a hat.
(it’s a present so i can’t show you)
when i looked at the little leftover ball,
i got the idea that, perhaps,
i could eek out another one.
nothing fancy, mind.
just a simple sailory skull cap.
“what the hell,” thought i,
“let’s give it whirl.”
but as i started my decreases tonight,
it didn’t look like i was going to make it;
the ball, well, it just looked too small.
(that’s what she said)
now, something weird happens when you think you’re going to run out of yarn. you start knitting more quickly, as if you can outrun the yarn or something. at least, that’s how it works with me.
as i got closer and closer and the stitches fewer and fewer,
it became pretty clear that this was a no go,
and i’d wasted all this time knitting.
frankly, the thought pissed me off.
if i’d done all this knitting
and couldn’t finish? well,
it just pissed me off!
i mean, i’ve been doing this for a while now.
i should’ve just gotten new ball.
i felt like such a chump.
but of course,
i didn’t stop knitting.
i refused to believe that i was wrong.
my will is powerful, and i would not be denied!
plus i kinda have this sick curiosity;
i just needed to know how close i was.
so suck it, knitting gods!
i owned your asses tonight!
of course, now i can’t find my chibis,
but i know they’re around here somewhere.
yarn: cascade 220. pattern: my own hat know-how
November 8, 2011
the metaphor that best describes my life these days
would be something like surfing.
each week is a new wave
i’m on top of this one.
*sigh* it’s like i’m working with chimps.
it’s the silkie socks that rock that i dyed
a year and half ago at the knot hysteria silk retreat
i can’t wait to take a shot in the daylight,
one that shows off the subtle genius of the dyer.
but i have a question:
how much further do you think i should knit
before i begin decreasing?
it’s been forever since
i knit a sock.
p.s. it’s so good to write a post about knitting again.
October 8, 2011
when i decided to go fro my phd,
i understood my knitting time would be severely reduced.
however, i don’t think i realized what “reduced” really meant.
i’ve considered that it might be prudent to give up the blog,
since the frequency of my f.o.’s will be greatly reduced.
but that kinda feels like quitting.
i wasn’t sure.
just when i thought this was the end of bitchesgetstitches,
i received a comment on my baltic blossoms shawl:
“This project was the reason I decided on this pattern for my boyfriend’s sister’s wedding present – Thank you!
(She doesn’t know that, but I think she might thank you too if she did)”
this was exactly what i needed.
i write this blog because people read it,
because, for some reason, my knitting speaks to other knitters.
and while, in the scheme of things, that might not be a big deal,
it makes me happy.
i want the blog to continue.
and if i want it to remain relevant and interesting,
i’m gonna need to get creative.
for now, i want to thank alyssa
for reminding me of my priorities!
September 26, 2011
it’s 6:30 am.
i have a fever.
i’m wearing a hat.
the dustland hat.
you should knit one, too.
(this is a microblog. bad web cam photos are part of their charm)
September 24, 2011
well i guess i’ve let this drag on long enough.
it’s time to announce some winners.
first prize, my thendara, goes to tina b.
the random number generator picked her number.
there was only supposed to be one second secret prize;
it was meant for the person who resposted the giveaway in most creative way. but how could i pick just one when
two ladies really stood out.
first there was tammy.
tammy got her coworkers to harass me into giving her my thendara.
i firmly believe in harassing people to get things you want.
i think it’s an only child thing.
while i couldn’t just give her my thendara
(that would be breaking the rules after all)
i have to applaud that kind of ingenuity.
so cynthia and tammy will be getting a copy of westknits book three
compliments of yours truly.
if either of you makes a thendara,
i’d love to see it.
until next time!
September 16, 2011
i don’t have much time,
but since so many people so
belligerently kindly told me
that my thendara was worth it, i’ll give it away.
the bitches get stitches thendara giveaway
the rules: the only thing you need to do to enter this giveaway is share this blog post in some fashion. you can tweet it, blog it, google+ it, post on ravelry, whatever. there should even be some convenient buttons at the bottom of the post to make sharing easier.
then, just leave a comment letting me know that you did it.
we’re on the honor system here.
my thendara (minus the mo, obviously), knit in sanguine gryphon bugga!.
there will also be a secret prize given to the person who(m?) i deem reposts this in the most interesting way.
good luck bitches!
edit: a winner has been chosen. thanks for playing!
p.s. you can currently pre-order westknits book three and knit one for yourself as well! go on. buy it. now!
September 13, 2011
i have made a,
the yarn carried up
the side is
does an imperfect
edge mean i
shouldn’t give it
August 29, 2011
ugh. i will never knit a gift for someone again.
i get too stressed as to whether or not they like it.
from now on, i’m giving my knits to strangers.
August 22, 2011
let’s get cracking.
1. i made a knitter. my student on saturday was amazing, a natural, a joy to teach. she will very soon spread her knitter wings and take off. i shall always remember alejandra, the scrub nurse from colombia and my first real knitting student. (actually, i’ll probably forget which is why i’m writing it down here).
2. today was my first day of t.a. orientation. for some bizarre reason i was really nervous about it and only slept for about three hours last night. but of course when i got there, it felt totally natural and, even though i feel really nervous about teaching, i am clearly more competent/less nervous than a lot of people in that room today. and a lot prettier which is of course a bigger comfort.
3. i saw a girl i went to highschool with at t.a. orientation. she either didn’t recognize me, or purposely ignored me. i’m not sure which is worse.
4. perhaps even more random, i saw the guy i bought my new craigslist couch from. he too either ignored or didn’t recognize me. either way, freaky right?
5. i was the only person in the big lecture hall knitting. this didn’t surprise me, but i was a little disappointed.
6. this week, i have been eating, on average, a half an onion and a clove of garlic per day. i am single, and mo doesn’t seem to mind so i’m going with it.
7. i’m getting really close to getting my wheel. i’m waiting on an email about it.
8. speaking of emails, i sent a bunch out to the knitters of the world, but only one responded. i fear that this is because i am a knitting nobody and do not merit a response. worse still, they could absolutely know who i am and have decided not to respond. it couldn’t possibly that they’re just busy people like me and have yet to respond. never. clearly, they either don’t know, or hate me.
9. i have an insane amount of laundry to do. rather than haul my ass to the laundromat, i just keep opening new suitcases to find clean clothes. or else i “sniff test” clothes i’ve already worn, and wear them again. (more evidence of my transition to manhood) this plan has worked for me for three weeks, but i see the end is near. today i had to go commando to my orientation. i made to sure to wear a belt, but kept obsessively checking my fly after the sexual harassment segment of the day.
11. since this is technically a knitting blog, i better show you a picture of some knittingi have embraced the fact that i am a shawl knitter. if other people can be sock knitters, i can be a shawl knitter. give me a triangle and i’m happy. of course, i’m using smaller yarn and needles meaning i’m going to have to do some maths to make the lace section work, but i’m sure that won’t pose any problems at all later on.
12. my rereading of the yarnharlot’s blog continues to be an inspiration. i’m pretty sure that’s why i’m doing a list post right now.
13. i recieved the awesomest of text messages today from a dear friend of mine:
“i’m knitting! also, loved the ‘sleep with as many people as possible’ note.”
what can i say, i’m part knitter, part scholar, part slut apparently (sorry mom). miss you jenny!
14. i thought rhinebeck was out of reach this year, but i may just have found a way to get there. this of course means i must find a pattern i like, and knit a new rhinebeck sweater.
16. i’m toying with the idea of getting my knitting mastery. is this a stupid idea? has anyone done it? help a boy out.
17. now that mo and i are reunited, my mother wants to alpacanap steven jr. i think this is some kind of manifestation of her desire for a grandchild. watch out sally.
18. extra large eggs are stupid.
19. mo has let me know in his not so subtle way it is time to be let out or else i’ll have a date later with the paper towel. later, bitches.