this is the sock that never ends

February 11, 2012

the never ending sock
continues on the path
of never ending.

i’ve read over and over how,
if you just take the sock with you
and knit a little hear and there,

BOOM!

it will be done.

clearly the yarn harlot is lying liar bad guy
because this sock will not fucking end.
i even knit on it in the movies! on dpns!
(i was proud. i fixed a drop stitch by feel)
i think i’m simply not a sock knitter
and socks will only end for sock knitters.

i thank heavens my dear reader nancy p.
took a shawl instead of this pair of socks
because she’d still be waiting.

the thing that really gets me?
i don’t even think these socks will end up being for me.
i think they’re just slightly too tight.

so i need to find a man with a)
a foot slightly smaller than mine & b)
will appreciate the socks.

of course i might have years to find this cinderello.
especially if the sock keeps growing at its current rate.
i’m just hoping this sock won’t celebrate its own anniversary
before i graft the fucker shut.

just keep knitting.
isn’t that what they say?
(sorry for the lousy office shot. it’ll have it’s proper photoshoot as a f.o.)

have i mentioned i leave for sweden on friday?

7 Responses to “this is the sock that never ends”

  1. Crystal Says:

    I love your posts. You never fail to make me giggle.

    P.S. Running through my head now is the song that never ends only I’ve subbed the word ‘song’ for ‘sock’.

    P.P.S. That looks like a mighty big sock you have there big guy. Gah. Sorry. I just couldn’t help myself.

  2. Anonymous, too Says:

    And just think. . .when you get this one done, you get to experience second sock syndrome. . .’-p!

  3. cauchy09 Says:

    yeah, socks change the space-time continuum. and i find the second sock takes more than 10 times as long to finish. best of luck.

    and Sweden? you lucky duck!

  4. Carol P Says:

    Have a wonderful time in Sweden! My DH has size 14 feet.
    Try finishing up a pair of socks of fit those feet. I had to buy another skein just for the leg. He’s worth it and loves my socks.
    Keep knitting!

  5. Sally at Rivendale Farms Says:

    I’m even a sock knitter and currently have a never-ending first sock, so sympathies your way. Can’t wait to hear about Sweden!!!

  6. Stephanie Says:

    you make me laugh. i have several single socks because the thought of knitting two is unbearable.

  7. Kate Says:

    You are so funny, Steven.

    My non-knitting husband has apparently been reading your blog (why wouldn’t he?). While watching tv and knitting a darkly coloured sock I dropped a stitch. I asked him to turn on the lights so I could fix it. He wanted to know why I couldn’t fix it by feel in the dark!


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